team1-4.1GP+rough+draft

Rough Draft [Working Title: Having the Know-it-all to Know It All.]

// You seek for knowledge and wisdom, as I once did; and I ardently hope that the gratification of your wishes may not be a serpent to sting you, as mine has been. -Shelley, // Frankenstein

en years ago, if you were to type in the words anorexia into a Google search, websites that focus on the terrible side effects that come along with this disease will appear. Today, if you were to perform the same Google search, websites that promote anorexia will appear instead. These websites teach young woman how to hide their anorexia, become thinner, and to ignore hunger pains. Many people feel these sites should be banned, because these sites are misleading young women to think it is alright to have an eating disorder. On other the hand, some people feel these sites are supporting young women in their struggles for maintaining a lifestyle they view as the norm. These sites are focusing on pro-ana and thinspiration. Pro-ana and thinspiration are two of the most commonly used words in these sites. Eating disorder support groups were first established by psychologists, but they were quickly taken off the internet short after (House of Thin). The initial reason these websites were created were to support people that were overcoming an eating disorder. The members that belonged to these websites were starting to explain their situations and how they kept this terrible disease from their loved ones. The sites quickly turned into a place where a person who has had thoughts of becoming anorexic would go and gain knowledge on how to be anorexic. The psychologists were noticing that many other blogs and websites were now devoted to pro-ana. Many teenage girls are visiting these sites and getting advice on how to hide this disorder from families and friends. As parents it is scary to know that by just one click of a mouse children can be influenced by sites that promote eating disorders. Instead of sites trying to stop this issue there are sites focused on teaching others how to maintain their disorder without getting noticed. There are many personal pages that are viewed by the public everyday – these sites give pro-ana advice to their viewers. One website that has many videos that support pro-ana is Youtube. One of the videos showed a young girl, and she was giving advice on how to live with anorexia. Her advice included: telling your parents you’re eating at a friend’s house and instead take a walk; take cold showers to make your metabolism work harder; punch yourself in the stomach when you want to eat, and worst of all do aerobics until you pass out (NaraChurch). Towards the end of the video she states that this is what is found on pro-ana websites, and she gives her viewers a website that is against eating disorders. Facebook and Myspace are now being used as a tool to teach people the steps, which are also known as the Ana Commandments. "The thought of this happening can be dangerous when placed before the eyes of vulnerable young girls and women. A girl who is having problems with her weight will more than likely have unhealthy thoughts when exposed to these Myspace groups" (A. Nicole). A Myspace webpage by a 19 year old girl from France had the Ana Commandments on her profile, so that all her viewers can see them. Some of the commandments included: "If you aren't thin you aren't attractive", or the third commandment, "You must buy clothes, style your hair, take laxatives, starve yourself, do anything to make yourself look thinner." These commandments are found on every pro-ana page. This page is something that is easily obtainable, and it is used to lure young girls into believing that this is the only way you can be beautiful. According to social comparison theory “people evaluate themselves through comparisons with others” (Jung & Peterson 43). When teen girls view these websites such as the thinspiration web page they are influenced by comparing their body types with extremely skinny models and actresses that are used to decorate those pages. The largest website dealing with this topic is called [|Live Journal Pro anorexia]. This site deals with everything concerning pro-ana. Thousands of girls belong to this site from all different cultures and countries, one thing they all have in common is that they all strive to be extremely thin. These teen girls believe that everyone should fast for a certain period of time in order to maintain a healthy weight. Many people may argue that this site is promoting anorexia; while others might view this site as a support group. The first reaction a person might receive is shock from the content of this website. For example one of the members by the name of XOX_Beth wrote in one of her post, "pins and needles, god d* it I need to exercise for 3 hours now before I can let myself sleep, and I have lots of college work to do, life is s*, and I just want to f starve. I don't deserve to enjoy anything, I don't deserve to live. I am a pathetic, fat, waste of space." Her responses to her post were mostly words of inspiration, and assuring her that eating something healthy is fine. Some people might change their views on this site and start viewing this website as a support group. The members of this group rely on each other for guidance; some of the members’ posts are graphic and speak of suicidal thoughts. This post was written by Reversed_Puberty, "I'm home alone and I keep thinking about my mom coming home to find me overdosed in my bedroom and I would be so free from my world of obesity and constant struggle just to look confident when I go to school even though it's all a lie and I don't know why I'm pretending anymore I have no friends and I feel so alone I'm so f alone." Reversed_Puberty received positive and inspiring messages from all the other members. Many of the other girls were concerned for both XOX_Beth and Reversed_Puberty, and by reading their responses you were able to better understand the purpose of these websites. Yes, some of these pages on Myspace/Facebook and Youtube should be better monitored, because they are showing their viewers that a person can never be too thin. But, websites like the Live Journal Pro Anorexia are different. A website like this allows the members to give moral support to the other members. The other blog post that were submitted by Reversed_Puberty were all dealing with suicide, and her friends on the website were able to talk to her and steer her in a better direction. No one really knows what goes on in their heads, because they are embarrassed to tell their peers or their parents. The members are not just members they are friends; that have a terrible thing in common that they can only share with each other. The reality is that these web sites exist, and though some people might want to stop these sites, because they are teaching other people how to become anorexic; other people need these sites to feel safe and stay alive. A second example of the Internet providing a gathering platform for users interested in not only increasing their knowledge but also finding like-minded individuals is the recent turn in political campaigning. A perfect example is Howard Dean. Howard Dean, the formally little-known governor of Vermont, used the web site Meetup.com to propel himself into the national spotlight during the contest for president in 2003 through 2004. John Kerry was the favored establishment candidate with boatloads of money but Governor Dean came close (there is a dispute about how close) to ripping the Democratic nomination from him. Meetup.com was created in 2002 and the Dean campaign started using it in 2003. Meetup.com is a networking site where people can connect with others who have similar interests and then have meetings in real life. It has become a common tool for political campaigns. The Dean camp would organize monthly meetings and send the Governor to go meet in person with them. In April of 2003 Howard Dean had upwards of 13,000 supporters on Meetup while Senator Kerry had only around 700. The Dean campaign then made a deal with Meetup and made a link from the Dean site to the Meetup site. In February of 2004 the Dean campaign was up to 189,000 supporters on Meetup. Dr. Dean only won one of the primary states and his campaign quickly faded into obscurity but not before he demonstrated the tremendous power of the Internet to connect and motivate people. After seeing the Dean people have so much success the Kerry camp signed a deal with Meetup and saw a huge increase in the number of supporters for Kerry. The Bush-Cheney campaign also got into the act by organizing parties through the Internet. At these parties people would get together and raise money and distribute campaign items like t-shirts and bumper stickers. These house parties played a significant impact in the 2004 presidential race. These online networking sites play a key role in the fund raising efforts of office seekers. Years ago there were less stringent campaign finance laws so individuals and corporations could give huge sums of money to the candidates they liked or wanted to influence. Now there are strict limits on how much individuals and corporations can give to political campaigns. This has made it imperative for candidates to seek many small donations to build up the massive pile of cash it takes to run an effective campaign. So these social networking sites spread the word about a candidate to many people and bring in multitudes of small donations. Al Gore believes Barrack Obama could not have won the presidency without using the web. Gore also said at the recent Web 2.0 conference that the Internet is a powerful tool for people to use in promoting social change. He believes people should use this new medium to rally support for environmental protection. Senator Obama did an excellent job of using the Internet to help get him elected. At one point in 2007 he was the only politician to rank in the top 100 of podcasts in the news and politics section. Obama has a very Internet savvy base of backers. His supporters are slightly more likely than Clinton backers to be Internet users and way more likely than McCain supporters. Phil Noble relates that when he was around Obama, he noticed that Obama would check his Blackberry every chance he got. This is a huge contrast to Senator McCain who does not like to use computers and says his wife helps him with them. Whatever the reason for this technological divide, Obama’s willingness to whole heartily embrace the Internet revolution has helped his cause. When Obama announced he was running for president his web site was already up and running. It was more than just generic information; it had ways for people to become involved in the campaign. One of the things which helped Senator Obama decide to run was the fact that an independent group of his supporters set up a page for him on MySpace and it quickly gained thousands of members. College students utilize various websites to search for information throughout the Internet. Wikipedia is just one of the many resources college students have at their fingertips. Wikipedia is a popular encyclopedia because of its easy access, clarity, and broad scope of information. It is founded and supported by a non-profit foundation called the Wikimedia Foundation. Because of this, any article that is added onto the Wikipedia database is free content and can be used, edited, and redistributed by any individual. Wikipedia is an open resource and is maintained by thousands of users worldwide. Jimmy Wales and Larry Sanger founded Wikipedia in 2001. It was initially supposed to be an English language project but has become a multilingual enterprise. Due to controversial topics, certain content is flagged. Occasionally, the need to freeze the editing feature of these topics is necessary until the topic becomes neutral again. Wikipedia welcomes every individual in order to present many different views on an issue and to try to neutralize the possibility of biases from just one demographic of contributors (Answers.com). Social media proves to provoke interest and support. Individuals that use Wikipedia frequently trust the site entirely; otherwise, they would find alternatives. Unfortunately, others think differently. Because Wikipedia is based off information that any person can alter or add information to, certain individuals believe that the information provided may be false. “Some commentators suggest that Wikipedia is usually reliable, but that it is not always clear how much” (Scott). There is no way to prove that the information presented on the website is correct. Since false information could be placed onto Wikipedia, MediaWiki software was designed to lessen unreliable material. Maintenance is performed through volunteers in the company. Also, users that are trusted can also gain permission to maintain websites. There are three levels of authority to maintain Wikipedia. Trusted individuals may be stewards, bureaucrats, or administrators for Wikipedia. Administrators have the most power and can delete pages, lock articles from being changed, and prevent users from editing pages. Despite Wikipedia’s efforts to cut down on unreliable information, such information nevertheless sneaks through the system. Through certain individual’s eyes, such as Jason Scott, “they (Wikipedia’s enforcers) allow totally anonymous full-content editing by random users.” The founders of Wikipedia created the project in order for individuals to be able to participate in a free service where their information and knowledge could build the expertise needed to learn about various topics throughout the world. The cause of the problem, according to Larry Sanger (the co-founder of Wikipedia), is the lack of respect for expertise and authority. Sanger writes, “If the project participants had greater respect for expertise, there would necessarily be very little patience for those who deliberately disrupt the project.” The more people who take the program seriously, the more creditable and factual information will be presented. Involving the public in the sharing of media will be beneficial as long as others do not abuse the seriousness of what is being asked of them. All in all, Wikipedia prevails and comes out on top. Taking the lead as one of the top searched websites is an impressive achievement. As Larry Sanger concluded, “Perhaps Wikipedia is better described as one of those sources regarded as unreliable which people read // anyway //.” Although Wikipedia may be expressed as unreliable in some cases, the program still conveys the strength to overcome such flaws and stand out as a reliable source of information. Where better to sample a getaway location than from your living room? How much better to find out how nice your ideal travel spot is from an honest visitor than from the agency or the locals? The Internet is an ideal place for the weekenders as well as the politicos and the support groupers, because it offers them some of the same benefits -- foreknowledge and advice from those who have gone before. The internet has numerous websites promoting vacations and when you are trying to plan your college spring break, it can be overwhelming with all of the available choices. You’ve worked long and hard for this vacation and you deserve to get away from it all. I’ve got the perfect solution - sunshine, warm tropic breezes, and a refreshing drink as you relax listening to your favorite songs. You deserve a destination like this and I’ll show you how to make it happen. I’ve narrowed your search down to a few exceptional internet websites. You first need to pick a destination and with all this cool weather, why not go someplace warm; how about an excursion to the United States southernmost point – Key West, Florida. It’s described as paradise with fabulous sunsets, spectacular snorkeling and diving in the only living coral reef in the U.S., and just good-time fun. Peter Frank of [|www.TravelandLeasure.com], suggest “fishing”, “kayaking” and watching the “sunset at Mallory Square” where you’ll witness the “legendary freak show - the contortionist,” “the fire juggler,” and “the escape artist” while sipping your drink as you meander along the pier. You must experience it at least once in your lifetime. A great site to visit for an excellent destination overview is [|www.smartertravel.com]. It states that for Key West, “The most popular time to visit is during late winter and spring, when the weather is pleasant and dry.” It’ll be perfect for spring break and it’s best to plan well in advance. To get the cheapest airfare, you need to be flexible with your dates. According to Fodors.com, in general the lower costs days are midweek; “these days typically see fewer passengers and quite often you'll get cheaper fares.” This is due to business travelers flying on a Monday and Friday and the weekends are traveled more heavily by families. For the best deal, you should plan to fly on Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday. One of best sites to compare airline flight schedules and pricing is [|www.Kayak.com]. This search engine will explore all the airlines that service the cities that you will fly to and from. To keep your costs low, it’s best to travel through major airports and you will want to purchase these tickets as soon as possible. Keith Melnick, Kayak’s executive vice president of corporate development, states that airlines try to “predict demand” from “both high-paying business travelers and leisure travelers looking for a cheap flight” and ticket pricing is based on this. Airlines only have a certain number of seats at discounted prices so it’s important to try purchasing them as quickly as possible. Kayak.com can also check nearby airports, which is highly recommended, to see if you can get a better price. Once you decide which flights would suit your needs, go directly to the airline site to book your tickets. You can get a larger selection of scheduled times and sometimes even cheaper prices. Where to stay is always a hard decision. The website [|www.tripadvisor.com] is a great site to get people’s personal opinions. The hotels are ranked based on traveler’s ratings and they’re very accurate. Members will provide valuable insight that you don’t get from the hotel’s web page. Some even supply pictures of the hotel and surrounding area. You’ll find a few people complaining about a hotel but it’s important that it has many more responses with positive feedback. You’ll find even the very best hotels will have someone with a complaint. Once you’ve narrowed down your hotel choices, use [|www.hotels.com] or [|www.kayak.com] to get a general idea for the best price. These sites are excellent search engines that you search based on your needs, such as; you can choose the price range, star ratings and guest ratings. Also www.hotels.com provides you with guest’s opinions. Use the above sites to gather detailed information; however, you will want to go directly to the hotel’s website because you can normally get a better price. Fodors.com/forums is a wonderful blog site to ask general questions; for instance, what to do, where to eat, or what the weather like is during a certain period of the year. It’s amazing the responses you’ll receive. They can be from people that live in the area to tourists that have visited there once or many times. The member’s opinions are highly valued and have been used by thousands of travelers for many years. Teaching is a stressful job, and when not looking over their summer vacation plans on travel sites, they gravitate towards their professions. This means that teachers tend to get together and talk shop with other teachers using something their students use in a similarly social way -- the Internet. But it goes beyond that: instead of simply having teachers chatting about quizzes and assignments, there are numerous possibilities for expanding scholastic knowledge into the Internet, and making an informal gathering into a formal education. Online education has a variety of forms. It can be a resource where teachers gather information, lesson plans, activities, and collaborate with other teachers. It can be an online school, where students take online classes. It can also be in the form of websites that students access for research, learning, and homework tools. Online education as a form of school has become widely used. It has made education more communal through social media resources. It has become commonplace for colleges and universities to offer online courses, but now the new advancement in online education is the strictly online degree program. Universities like DeVry, Kaplan and Walden offer online classes for students pursuing Associate, Bachelors, Masters and Doctorate degrees. The most common degrees earned online are business, technology, nursing, criminal justice, heath care, education and psychology. Online education is not limited to the higher education classrooms of colleges and universities. The Internet and online education are radically affecting high schools, middle schools, and elementary schools. Silver State High is a high school located in Nevada. It has coined itself as the “first statewide virtual high school”. Silver State High has a traditional campus, but students are not required to attend. The only requirement is one day a week for a minimum of 4 hours. Silver State High administrators want their students to have a college type schedule, where they can play and manage their own days. This will grant students time management skills that they need as adults. Students at Silver State High use interactive lessons, web camera lectures and real time experiences with other classmates. The students at Silver State High are provided with an unlimited amount of resources to further their Internet education. The internet program at Silver State High has also benefited the teachers who are able to have one on one contact with their students, but allow them to learn at their own pace. Apart from helping teachers educate, the Internet has allowed teachers to connect with their colleagues, access lesson plans and research materials, and further their own education. Sites such as The Teacher’s Network provide teachers with chat rooms where they can discuss ideas, problems and strategies. The Teacher’s Network also provides access to lesson plans for all education levels. The Teacher’s network is devoted to connecting teachers in order to enhance the education of students, but without the teacher, sites like The Teacher’s Network do not function. Internet sites such as Blackboard require the interaction of student and teacher. Blackboard has many features that facilitate and aid education. It has an online grade book, assignment book, online test and quizzes, online activities and online chat rooms for teachers and students to discuss problems or course material. Sites like Blackboard allow parents to get directly involved with their children’s education. Parents can use Blackboard to communicate with teachers, as well as keep track of the progress their child is making in the course. Black board brings teachers, parents, and students together through its use of online education. Online education has proved to be a successful form of education whether it be in the form of classes online, resources for teachers online, or lessons and help for students online. These forms of education all encourage communication between others using the online resource. Teachers looking for lesson plans can communicate with other teachers, students taking online classes use discussion boards and chat rooms to communicate, and students use online interactive tools to communicate with their teachers, parents and classmates. The Internet has made education communal through social media resources. Insidious is the Internet -- not only is it used to gather people, but it also traps them unawares and lays them out to be used as raw data. This can be seen in the numerous ways a user can be tracked and identified, if not by name, then by number. There are ways of identifying the hopefully anonymous internet user, and the most prominent one is through search entry logging. What happens is that a search engine (most notably Google, and although they themselves refrain from providing information, their services are purchased by other notable entry data rollover corporations, such as AOL) takes the users’ entries and matches them with the IP address that the request comes from. This is, in and of itself, not an identification of the user, but search patterns can become evident after a few lines, and even if there are only a few entries, those close to the unidentified query quester could pick up on who it is. This is most notably seen in an article from The Guardian by Brown that cites the 2006 release, for a study, of one million search entries and their respective IP addresses. It gives an interesting example of a drunken fan of Portuguese football whose unsatisfied wife has left him. All of these minute aspects of a single user can be seen from some of his search entries: “he searched for ‘Stop your divorce’ and ‘I want revenge to my wife’ before turning to self-examination with ‘alcohol withdrawal’, ‘alcohol withdrawal symptoms’ (at 10 in the morning) and ‘dysfunctional erection’ (Brown). It goes on to show that aside from the (very descriptive) multitude of searches there are a few examples of an individual making just a few, but being just as memorable – such as a grandmother alternately searching for Christian-themed quilt wall hangers and vibrators. Both of these users had their identities ‘protected’ by being referred to by their IP addresses: it is readily apparent that there is little solace in the anonymity of a number – dozens of other searches give hundreds of clues as to this poor user’s identity. The Internet is a strange place when seen through the filter of a search bar. In addition to its use from the other side of the mirror, as it were, ‘Googling’ has become a routine process in finding information on a subject, from math homework to the prospective employee. According to the Privacy Rights Clearinghouse, "reports indicate an increase in employers who “Google” prospective employees. The employer thinks of this as a cheap and convenient “background check.” Unfortunately for the job applicant, this type of “background check” is not covered by the Fair Credit Reporting Act (FCRA). The FCRA only covers background checks done by a third party. Since the employer is doing the check itself, the law does not require disclosure to the applicant. Perhaps most unsettling, the employer does not have any legal obligation to tell the applicant that the Internet search led to their disqualification" ("Privacy in Cyberspace"). This is just another way that Internet abuse can rob certain persons, who may or may not themselves be on the Internet, of certain rights and privileges. There are more issues with the Internet than tracking -- the BBC says that there is a growing incidence of users reusing passwords. This reuse leads to a great many successful identity thefts, and being tracked by a malcontent is one of the easiest ways to lose the one password used to access the majority of your secured files. “Growing use of the web is stripping people of their personal privacy... [t]he number of passwords and logins web users need makes it inevitable they will re-use phrases…” (BBC). And of course, malicious users aren’t restricted to breaking into your email to find important information – viruses, spyware, and phishing are other ways that someone that is not you can get and use your data. There are countless ways a cunning intruder can gain access, and there is only a small portion of internet users capable or wary enough to protect themselves. There are quite a few famous versions of each, from the I LOVEYOU virus (debated to be more a Trojan horse than a virus), the Storm worm, and the Nigerian phishing ploy (Brain). The Nigerian phishing ploy, and all its various siblings, has been around for over a decade, and still manages to ensnare quite a few unsuspecting victims a year. This is a prime example of how a cunning, or persistent, thief can gather, and then abuse, personal information (more specifically, your bank account information). All of these are examples of how the Internet can be used to gather people, information, and generate knowledge. They all provide fair views into a myriad of topics, and yet they, in total, do not begin to describe even the smallest portion of the Internet. This is not to discourage further study or interest, just a warning: Whatever you think of, someone else has probably thought of it first, and beat you to the URL. So take it easy -- if you read a web page every second, you'll only have to read for about 1600 years: there are somewhere on the order of 50 billion web pages on the internet ("Index"). Now, not all of those are dedicated to the pursuit of knowledge, but discounting all but a thousandth of a percent still leaves some half-million web pages devoted to the advance of human knowledge. That is quite a few people saying a goodly number of things.

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Chick Click Review
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 * **What is the thesis?** Type out the thesis you find in the paper in your own words; it will help you see whether the writer's main insight is made sufficiently clear. <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">(Kelly From the intro I can understand that the thesis is about Internet use and how you can use it to corrdinate information and gather comments from thousands of people. How one indicidual can have an idea and collaborate with other unknown users. After the intro I got lost then thinking your paper was about anorexia. It's a great intro but the lead in was a little confusing. <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">
 * <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);"> **How is the essay organized?** Describe in three or four sentences how the essay is organized. This will help you determine if the structure was clear. <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">(Laura) It has an intro, however after that It's extremely confusing to read. It talks about websites for anorexia, then it talks about politics, traveling, and education. It's very mixed and I'm not sure what their topic is exactly.So, their structure is not clear.
 * **Was the organization logical?** Was this the best way the writer could present their information? <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">(Sara) I struggle to write this because while I think it could use a lot of improvement, I am also sure that the Know-It-Alls are aware of this and already plan to improve it during the editing process. Right now it feels more like a jumble of various smaller essays than one essay with one topic.
 * **Were any parts not relevant to the thesis?** As a reader did you pause to wonder how a statement or paragraph was related to the thesis? <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">(Sara) Again, so far, the whole thing feels very detatched and unrelated to itself but I am convinced the transitions will be smoothed out and each of the "smaller essays" will be made relevant for the final draft. One thing I hope they consider is the tone of the overall essay. In some places it is very informal and in other places it becomes very formal. Some sort of balance between the voices would be nice.
 * **What examples and types of evidence were most convincing?** Did the essay engage your emotions and appeal to your experiences in appropriate ways? <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">(Krystal) The very first example of how the internet has come so far in ten years is a very good example. Search engines have changed in what they return when you search something, especially on such a topic as anorexia. I also thought the paragraphs on online classes were very convincing. College's have allowed many who cannot attend school in the morning hours available to work from home to get a degree and further their education. I think you did a great job explaining the different colleges that offer online courses and what they offer.
 * **What two places could use more development?** Which places in the text need more evidence, examples, explanation. <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">(Liz) I felt like there was a ton of info on the pro-ana websites, that section was well researched and written and then the part about meetup.com and politics etc..that part seemed kind of short in comparison. Since these papers are so long, I would just make sure each topic area is explored and developed equally. Also, I just couldn't get into the section on Wiki. This is not to annoy anyone but I did notice the quotes from Sanger (I think it was) was stuff we read for class, and I didn't like it then either. All that stuff about the ins and outs of wiki is so much harder to understand than the rest of the paper. I guess I would have liked it better if it was interpreted and explained differently in a way I could understand. Again, just my opinion.
 * **Did the introduction catch your attention?** The writer was probably writing about a topic that already interests them, so did they communicate that interest to you? <span style="color: rgb(0, 9, 255);">(Caitlin) <span style="color: rgb(43, 0, 255);">The start of the introduction is pretty interesting. Is the quote at the top part of the paper? Because if it isn't I would high suggest putting it in the paper . <span style="color: rgb(32, 14, 246);">The proverb is a good touch, I think it gives a little of an idea of what you would be discussing. You definitely do a good job leading to the thesis.